Someone is high jacking NASA and Soviet spacecraft while in orbit! At the height of the space race of the 1960s, the mysterious disappearances of these vessels have the USA blaming Russia, and Russia blaming the USA. Both are threatening war!
Meanwhile, the cool heads in Britain’s MI6 have noted how these spacecrafts’ return to earth end somewhere in the Sea of Japan, making Japan their top suspect.
After faking his death to get the international criminal organisation SPECTOR off of his tail, James Bond (Sean Connery) is sent to Tokyo to investigate. There, Bond finds himself looking into Osato Chemicals after his Japanese contact is murdered by one of its employees. Bond steals some of Osato documents, and brings them to the head of the Japanese Secret Service, Tiger Tanaka (Tetsuro Tamba). The documents reveal the head of the company as a SPECTOR agent who is supplying the organization with rocket fuel. Now why would SPECTOR need rocket fuel… if they were not sending rockets into space!
There are parts of You Only Live Twice I remembered as not being PC. Mostly, the part where they turn James Bond “Japanese.” I mean, there is blackface and then there is half naked women applying prosthetic make up to Sean Connery’s eye lids. And you know… the results are not that great. Sarah commented on how they made him look more so like Mr. Spock than East Asian. I agree.
Bond’s entire trip to Japan features an insane amount of racism and fetishism. Several Japanese women bath him because “in Japan, men come first”. Then Tiger takes Bond on a tour of Japan’s training facilities where the men are learning to use Samurai swords and shurikens. Come on, World War II didn’t set Japan back 200 years, lol. If this movie was made today the justified internet outrage would ensure no one involved would work in Hollywood again.
But, it came out in the 1960s, it made over 100 million world wide, and everyone had long careers afterward. So, like a lot of older films, you have to put it into the context of when it was released or not watch it.
With that in mind, You Only Live Twice is still below par. Even for James Bond, the story is as messy as it is implausible. The original story in Ian Fleming’s novel was adapted by his friend, Roald Dahl (Yes, THAT Roald Dahl). Dahl was upfront about how he viewed it as Fleming’s worst book and he had no idea how he was going to make it into a movie. He only carried over “four or five ideas” from it and chose a plot “similar to Dr. No” during the few months he had to write the script.
I remember as a kid being let down by the reveal of Ernest Blofeld who had been built up since From Russia With Love as a menacing man who will eventually be a true opponent for Bond. Instead, we get Donald Pleasence. A fine actor, but his voice and appearance in this film is more unsettling than intimidating.
Of course, it was this version of Blofeld which became the visual inspiration for Mike Myers Dr. Evil in the “Austin Powers” series. He didn’t stop there, however, as a lot of the imagery of the space program and underground lair are used too. Really, the absurdity of the plot is ripe for farce.
Now, for what you are really here for: My continuing competition with Sarah to correctly guess how long it would take Bond to get laid. Honestly, I can write an entire post about how this one went. The short of it is, Sarah stuck with 17 minutes (Why not? It has worked well for her so far!) and I changed it up and went with 13 minutes. Bond let us both down by taking 38 minutes to seal the deal with any of the ladies. Since we were both not even close, we decided to call it a draw. The score remains:
Sarah – 4
Mars – 0.0
You Only Live Twice isn’t a terrible movie with plenty moments to like. The first half is as good as any spy thriller since the more silly bits are saved for the last half. There is some great stunt work including Bond using a couch to fend off on rather large guard. The scene where Bond takes out a mini-copper for surveillance and ends up in a dog fight with other choppers was a lot of fun. Absurd, but fun.
I think there was too much pressure to make this film stand out. At this point in 1967, it was thought to be Connery’s last outing as Bond and the popularity of the character had spawned a sea of copy cats. Not only did you have the Harry Palmer and Derek Flint series to compete with, but Columbia Pictures released a James Bond film, Casino Royal staring David Niven a few months prior to this. That’s why “Sean Connery Is James Bond” is predominate in a lot of the promotional material.
So they went bigger than the competition. And bigger isn’t always better.
2.5/5
Hoho! This is the one I was talking about not so long ago with a pal, but I couldn’t remember the title. We were talking about Connery and, naturally, got talking about Bond and the outrageousness of the “one with the ninjas”. Absolutely shocking stuff.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeah, embarrassingly enough as a kid I didn’t think much of it. I was more upset about Blofeld being so weak, lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
First! Yeah, I don’t think I could re-watch these without thinking of Austin Powers, anymore. Still, good on you for sticking it out, despite its obvious flaws. Truly, turning off your brain is highly recomended ha! And 38 minutes?? Bond be slippin’!
LikeLiked by 2 people
No kidding! 38 minutes in the the record so far! Turing the brain a little further off is recommended for this one!
LikeLike
Good thing I usually leave mine off!
LikeLiked by 1 person
The mini helicopter scenes are the biggest reason I watch this one for…Little Nellie.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Yeah, definitely a highlight moment. We got a good laugh every time one of those model helicopters exploded.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Bond held on for 38 minutes! lol! That is indeed impressive speaking in Hollywood terms.
LikeLiked by 1 person
He better move fast in the next one or we might quit this series under protest!
LikeLiked by 1 person
lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
Wow, this one is very cringeworthy. Yikes! That would definitely fly today. Ha!! And cool to see more Austin Power inspirational moments. I am enjoying this bond series I don’t think I’ve seen them all especially these early ones.
LikeLiked by 1 person
They’re all good fun but yeah, this one has some… troubling moments that are too hard to ignore. The Austin Powers stuff is fun to spot!
LikeLiked by 1 person
Lucky we have the cool heads at M16 to save the day. Not the best as you say but still a blast to watch.
And I like the men come first rule in Japan. Lol.
LikeLiked by 1 person
My wife wasn’t buying that one for some reason, lol
LikeLiked by 1 person
I come for the fine reviews, I stay for the vintage posters / austin powers parallels / and the competition!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I knew you would enjoy your stay once I got you through the door!
LikeLiked by 1 person
I seen this in the theater when it came out. Loved it ‘Little Nellie’ and Donald Pleasance are stuck in the brain pan.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Little Nellie was definitely a highlight! I feel like even I could beat up Donald Pleasance and I’m not a tough guy.
LikeLiked by 1 person
That Donald comment is one of the best I’ve come across Mars. Perfect. I’m still chuckling. I wonder how many “Top 10 Bad Guy” lists Pleasance makes?
LikeLiked by 1 person
Don’t get me wrong, I think he is a good actor. I just don’t think what they built up to should have been Donald Pleasance.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Not getting you wrong Mars. I love the guys work and it is a piece of brilliant casting. Against the grain. Sort of like Ben Kingsly. They can both play intellectual and then creepy. Mentally unbalanced is scary.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Joe Pesci too! It is the crazy ones you really need to keep an eye on.
LikeLiked by 1 person
Joe is a perfect example.
LikeLiked by 1 person